I’m tired…

More Dead Flowers by Bill Gracey

I’m tired of leaving my doctor’s office and coming home to the reality that I’m still going to be in loads of pain all day everyday.

I’m tired of waking up every hour of the night and realizing how much I’m hurting and how hard it will be to fall back asleep like that, only to do it all again in an hour.

I’m tired of finally believing we’ve gotten somewhere with my pain management, only to soon realize that I’m basically where I started.

I’m tired of being given all these fantastic ideas on different types of exercise that can actually help those living in chronic pain, while instead I’m being left in so much pain that I’m not sure how I’m going to make it out of bed at all.

I’m tired of getting up each day and not having the slightest clue how I’m going to make it through the entire day, never mind how I could possibly enjoy doing it.

I’m tired of knowing that someone who doesn’t suffer like I do 24/7 is the one who has the power to make my life more bearable, but doesn’t.

I’m tired of doctors who think that only treating “about 30%” of my pain is enough, when I’m only 20 years old and will have to spend everyday of the rest of my life with it.

And most of all, I’m tired of fighting so hard for so little.